This time around I am not anxious for a baby's arrival. I am not googling techniques on how to induce labor as I know that labor will eventually start when she is ready to arrive. I know that each day that passes, is one less day that I will have with just dividing my attention between 2 children. I know that each day that passes, makes her a stronger person for the outside world. I may be uncomfortable and ready for her arrival. I think that is God's purpose though. I think its a chance for a woman to be ready for birth and to let go of being pregnant. I have enjoyed these last 9 months of pregnancy. I have enjoyed feeling her move and listening to her heartbeat. I am ready to meet her once she is ready to meet us.
I am going on walks. I am using my exercise ball. I am doing these things to help prepare me for labor this time around. I am not using them as a way to get her out. Although I do joke with Jeff when he asks if I need anything and my response is, "the only thing I need is a baby out." All in good time she will. Just try to lighten the mood a bit as my mood is not the greatest right now. I'm hoping with popping out a baby, it pops out a new attitude.
Next appointment is this Friday if I don't go into labor before then.
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
Saturday, February 22, 2014
Final Thoughts Towards The End of 3rd Pregnancy
My head is full of mixed emotions right now. If I can't hold a conversation with you, that is why. I can't remember what day it is sometimes or the last time I ate. My mind is on the overwhelming thought of 3 children in the very near future.
Some days I feel like I want to be pregnant for at least another 3 or so months. I'm really not prepared to juggle 3 kids. I'm not prepared to give up Carson as being the baby of the family. I'm somewhat comfortable and this baby doesn't get me up all hours of the night to use the bathroom unlike the other two. I know what to expect with labor and recovery afterwards. I know the reset of emotions your body goes through a week or so after you have a baby. There is no manual on raising a child let alone juggling 2 or more. I will most likely never see a baby of mine on an ultrasound or listen to a heartbeat every 4 weeks. I will most likely never see a positive on a pregnancy test again and feel my heart leap for joy. Its coming to the end of being pregnant and this stage in my life.
Then there's the other side. She can come out RIGHT NOW!! My belly is hanging so low that I feel like I have a "roll" that goes over my pants. I am uncomfortable at times. I am very anxious to meet her sweet face. I can't wait to dress her in her adorable outfits I have been picking out for the past few months. I want to see Carson and Savannah's reaction to meeting the next member of our family. I'm ready to share her name and give her an identity other than baby girl Raiders.
Right now, the grass is not greener on either side. I am stuck on the fence. 37 weeks comes on Monday. I delivered Savannah and Carson at 38.5 weeks. I know the time is ticking so I'm trying to soak up both sides regardless of the outcome. Oh by the way, I'm almost halfway to the finish line as well. So far I'm sitting at 4cms. I could sit that way for weeks or tonight could be it. She's healthy right now whichever path she chooses. I will just have to be ready.
Some days I feel like I want to be pregnant for at least another 3 or so months. I'm really not prepared to juggle 3 kids. I'm not prepared to give up Carson as being the baby of the family. I'm somewhat comfortable and this baby doesn't get me up all hours of the night to use the bathroom unlike the other two. I know what to expect with labor and recovery afterwards. I know the reset of emotions your body goes through a week or so after you have a baby. There is no manual on raising a child let alone juggling 2 or more. I will most likely never see a baby of mine on an ultrasound or listen to a heartbeat every 4 weeks. I will most likely never see a positive on a pregnancy test again and feel my heart leap for joy. Its coming to the end of being pregnant and this stage in my life.
Then there's the other side. She can come out RIGHT NOW!! My belly is hanging so low that I feel like I have a "roll" that goes over my pants. I am uncomfortable at times. I am very anxious to meet her sweet face. I can't wait to dress her in her adorable outfits I have been picking out for the past few months. I want to see Carson and Savannah's reaction to meeting the next member of our family. I'm ready to share her name and give her an identity other than baby girl Raiders.
Right now, the grass is not greener on either side. I am stuck on the fence. 37 weeks comes on Monday. I delivered Savannah and Carson at 38.5 weeks. I know the time is ticking so I'm trying to soak up both sides regardless of the outcome. Oh by the way, I'm almost halfway to the finish line as well. So far I'm sitting at 4cms. I could sit that way for weeks or tonight could be it. She's healthy right now whichever path she chooses. I will just have to be ready.
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