Almost a year

It truly is hard to believe that it has almost been a year since I had Savannah Joy. I can't help but remember since September, everything I was going through a year ago. When I was pregnant with her, it seemed like the time went by so slow. I couldn't wait to have the next step and hold her in my arms. Now she is a very busy almost toddler. Yikes! About a year ago I was put on bedrest at this time. At that time I thought it was the most torturous thing I could go through. Bedrest sounds pretty good right now. I'm exhausted from my cold and from chasing a certain someone around. It doesn't help that I've been up with her in the middle of the night because she's been coughing so much.

Anyways, a year ago, Jeff and I could never have imagined that our life would turn out this great. We never would have imagined looking into someone's eyes and instantly falling in love. Jeff is such a great dad too. He loves to play with Savannah. His best memory he said was when he took the week off after she was born. He loved being able to just cuddle up with her on the couch. It's those memories that you can hold onto forever. Work can wait. Spending time with your family is such a precious gift. I can still remember how it felt to feel her move inside of me. I miss that feeling some days. I loved the anticipation of wondering what she was going to look like. To hear her heartbeat everytime I went to the doctor. And I loved the nesting desire. A year ago, I nursed a baby for the first time. I felt what it was like to come home and feel like a totally different person. You are a mom now and have all these new emotions that you have never felt before. You are so worried that you are going to mess something up. You feel like all the eyes of the world are on you saying you better get this right. Now that its almost been a year, we are slightly more relaxed. Yes, we still worry as all parent do but I don't run in her room every 15 mins anymore to make sure she's still breathing. I guess you could say that I'm becoming more comfortable in my new skin as a "mom."

This certainly won't be the last child we have. Remembering a year ago makes me excited to welcome another child into our family...someday! For right now....Savannah enjoys being the center of our attention. Summer is coming which means lots of new things to discover. And we aren't quite "settled" yet. So for all those people who are asking me if I'm pregnant yet or wondering when we are going to start trying for another one. You will just have to wait in anticipation like a pregnant mom anticipates hearing her baby's first cry.

Spring has sprung in Mass.

The sun is shining today and it feels like spring. One last effort to make us sick is trying to make its way through our house. I really can't complain though because our family for the most part has missed all the sickness this winter. This cold is so far short-lived I see. I can see all the buds on trees and dandelions (yes dandelions) are popping up in the backyard. The Boston area is such a beautiful area in the spring. I've heard that it gets better in the fall. I can hardly wait. Well I actually I can wait because I enjoy the warm weather so much. I am not a person that likes winter. My goal in life is to move away from the snow.

Savannah is very Very active now. Once she figured out the crawling thing, she quickly got bored with that and was more interested in pulling herself up on things. She now furniture walks all over. Our living room is kind of set up like an obstacle course because she gets mad when she can't reach the next object to "walk" to. Every toy needs to come out of the toy bin. Once that happens, then we get bored. She gets the biggest kick out of sticking objects on top of something now. She will pull herself up to a chair to place a toy up there and sit back down to look up at it and laugh. Whatta goof!!! She insists on pulling everything out of drawers and opening all the cabinets. All the chemicals are making their way up and out of reach. I have no idea how to babyproof cabinets in a rental that doesn't have knobs on cabinet doors/drawers. If anyone has a suggestion, I'm open to it. I've been doing lots of looking on Babies R Us and Target. So far, nothing. Until then I pick everything up after she goes to bed and enjoy a clean house until she wakes up the next morning. Somedays I think that my house has a monkey in it!

Now for a summer project. I have decided to strip the painted on stain off of Savannah's changing table and crib to paint it a lovely cream. I can hardly wait for the final result. Why cream? Doesn't show the dust as easily and if it chips, it won't be as noticeable as a dark finish. So happy its finally getting warm out.

The Best Day Ever (through Savannah's eyes)

The day didn't start off that great. I couldn't stand up in my crib because daddy lowered it. Instead I just yelled until mommy got out of bed. I really didn't want juice like normal but instead insisted oatmeal. It was hard at times to decide whether I wanted to take another bite of oatmeal or steal a drink to wash it down. Most of the time I just kept eating worried that if I stopped mom might get up to do something else.

Mom put me in a pretty dress today for church. Church is this huge building with all kinds of people to look at. We sing songs. I'm not really sure of the words yet but I do my best to hold a note. I at least want to be heard. Mom tried to stick me in the nursery today but I refused to miss out on the service. She even tried to convince me to stay by sitting in the nursery with me but I just cried to let her know how much I was against that decision. Haha jokes on her to think that I'm going to ever stay in that room. After church daddy bought me a donut hole that I shoved in my mouth. I couldn't quite mush it all in my mouth so mom broke it up into smaller pieces.

The day just kept getting better and better. I took a much needed nap after that big adventure out. I mean, all that singing and crying wears a person out. I ate spaghetti for lunch. That is by far one of my favorite meals. I got to crawl around in the grass and taste a little bit of it too. I have to say, spaghetti tastes better. I watched mommy and daddy do all kinds of things in the yard. I have no idea what they were doing but it sure did keep my attention. They tried to gate me in at times on the deck so I just tried to eat my way through the gate once standing and shaking it didn't work. It was simply magnificent being outside. I got to see all kinds of things that I normally don't see in the house. How can a person stand to look at the same scenery for that amount of time? I have things to explore and taste. I also got to ride in the shopping cart at Lowe's. What could be better!

I tried to catch a quick snooze when they put me back in the car. I had no idea where I was going but I was wearing a swimming suit. The next thing I know I'm being taken out of my car seat again and my swimming buddy is with me. I get more and more excited when I see my floating device being blown up. I know whats coming next is going to be great. I had the best time in the pool. I got to kick and splash. by the time I got out of the pool, there was not a dry spot on me. I came home to have supper (spaghetti again!!) Then I got a bath afterwards. Aww life is great! Mommy put my pajamas on and read me a book. After a day like today, a girls gotta rest for the next adventure tomorrow.

Childhood memories

Jeff has had a couple days this week that has caused him to have to go to bed early due to waking up extra early to arrive to work earlier than usual. I try to be a very good sport and support him by going to bed early with him. It's a compromise that we have worked out and I don't mind laying down. It forces me to relax and take it easy after a long day of entertaining a screaming baby Savannah.

As I lay awake and Jeff sleeps, I spend that time praying for my cousin Emily. While praying for her it has gotten me to remember once again all the times that she has been there for me in my life. I know that she holds a special part in my life but to honestly remember everything fills my heart with overwhelming joy but at the same time so much guilt for not being able to help her out as much as I should be if I were closer.

So the story goes... Emily and I have known each other since we were crawling age. I bet you can't tell which is which in the picture :) We were only 9 months apart. I always joked with her that her mom had her and my mom thought hey that looks like a good idea and thats when I was made. Our parents tell us that we were pretty good at getting into trouble such as using a clothes basket to slide down the stairs. I viewed her as my sister seeing that my sister didn't come until 4 years later. All three of us were very close. We lived about 4 miles from each other and would frequently ride bikes to each others houses. Usually Hillary and I would ride over to Emily's since she lived closer to town. That way we could ride our bikes in town. After storms we would ride 4-wheeler around to pick up branches. It was never fun picking a yard up by yourself but when you had some great company it went by quickly.  I remember riding the bus together and I would always sit next to her. There was some cruel boys on the bus but when I sat next to her I felt stronger. We went to Colorado together when we were 16.

This picture was taken right before we went white water rafting.

This was taken at our campground. This is absolutely one of my favorite pictures of us. I blame Emily for getting me involved in a lot of my interests that I developed throughout my life. She has given me a love for games, scrapbooking, and swimming. Without her in my life I'm not sure who I would have turned out to be. She is definitely one of the most important people in my life.

As I lay there at night thinking about all these memories plus more, I can't help but wonder when did we grow up? I think when life hits you with something this life changing, it makes you change your whole perspective on life. It matures you more. It wakes you up and makes you realize that your an adult. This is life and you need to rely on God more than ever. This situation has changed Emily and I's relationship forever. I think this tough circumstance will grow our relationship in a way that it might not have grown if life were simpler. Sometimes we just need to sit back and not as why but instead say thank you.

A little of everything

I have been anxious to update my blog about something exciting that we have done in Massachusetts so far. I haven't been able to do that yet because we really haven't gotten out to do too much since its been a little chilly to walk anywhere in the city. We had high hopes to go to the aquarium in Boston and show Savannah all the cool animals but after Jeff standing in the cold, windy weather for an hour and getting to the ticket booth finally, he decided that he wanted to go when we would have more time there. By the time he got to the ticket booth, they would be closing in 2 1/2 hours. It was going to be a lot of money to get in for such a short time. We will try at a later date. We tried to walk around the downtown area for a little bit but it was just too cold. We weren't dressed for the weather as we were expecting to be indoors. At least I was able to see Boston and we all got out of the house for the afternoon.

We also found a church to attend yesterday. It was very easy this time around. I wish it would have been that easy in Austin. One church and it was meant to be. Jeff and I usually can not agree on one aspect of the service usually. When I like the music, he doesn't or when he liked the sermon, I really didn't. This church worked for both of us. There was even a song in the service that spoke to both of us. We looked at each other on the way home totally freaked out. This is the place that we are meant to be at right now.

We have also met some wonderful friends. They are newly married and expecting their first baby in June. So excited for them. Dan has been mentoring Jeff through this training. It's so great how everything has just clicked so far. Wendy (Dan's wife) is also a very down to earth person. They are both from MN. I just have to sit back in amazement at times how God works in our lives.

I will admit, at times I am heartbroken to be out here. Things like being reminded that Savannah will not be celebrating her birthday with all her family around her high chair singing happy birthday to her as she dives for her cupcake. This weekend I felt sad that I couldn't be at home with my cousin Emily. We grew up 5 miles from each other and would frequently ride our bikes back and forth to each others houses. Our lives would drift apart every now and then but whenever they came back together, we would pick up right where we left off. She had a c-section on Friday and I'm not able to visit her in the hospital. I'm not able to wrap my arms around her and tell her that I'm here for her and everything's going to be ok. Instead, I watch from a website hoping to hear an update. Instead I pray for her all day. It truly breaks my heart that I can't be there to help her through this difficult time. In life we take things like life for granite. We expect that everything is going to go right in a pregnancy. God humbles us by showing that we still need to put all of our trust in him. Thats exactly what Scott and Emily are doing. This is one of the most difficult times in their lives. It amazes me how people can go through life and not believe in God. How do they get through these difficult times? How do you face the next day when its full of uncertainty without trusting in God? That's how I'm making it out here. I know that God wants us out here right now. I would love to be selfish and stay in my comfort zone of home. If I did that, I would not grow. I would not meet new people that mold me into a better person. I would not be able to feel the love of my husband that I do now. I feel closer to him now than I have in 3 years. Out here we are only depending on each other. Moving here has done the best thing to our marriage.

Now its time to brag about my husband. He is so much happier in this career change. He has more energy when he comes home at night and is a more lovable person to be around. He's starting to slack on helping out around the house again but we got that turned around :) He is ahead of his training and his boss told him that he doesn't expect him to be here as long as they first anticipated. That's the only challenging part with a Hormel life. You never know when your spouse will come home to tell you that were moving. Jeff's doing a wonderful job as a sales trainee and I am so proud of him.

The unblog

I had a whole blog written out but then I deleted it. I want to share with you how great things are out here and tell you about all of adventures but just can't seem to muster up the strength to do it today. Just know that I could use some prayer for strength and guidance. I am always in need of wisdom on what to say so you can throw that in there. My life is no bed of roses right now. There's quite a few thorns but they are gradually working themselves out.

Girls day!

Today I did little housework. I fought back the urge to go through the spare bedroom and rid it of anything not needed and sort through that mountain of paperwork from the past month. Instead I spent the time playing patty cake and singing toddler tunes. I took her to BabyGap and she pointed out (and pulled down) all the pretty clothes that she liked. She always knows when we are shopping for her. I can't figure out how she knows. When I walk into my department she immediately is a disobedient shopper. Customers and employees talked to her and made her feel like the center of attention. We snuggled up fora  nap together which mommy needed just as much as she did. I adore the days when I kiss my cares away and just enjoy the company of God's beautiful creation. I know she will grow up so quickly and I don't want to look back and say to myself that I should have enjoyed the moments far greater than I did. It's days like these that your heart feels warm. The sun shining in the window seems brighter and your shoulders feel less burden. Her only worry right now is getting the object thats out of reach. She lacks patience and determination. Something that I might not notice if I were too caught up on the household tasks. I painted her nails for the first time today. I did manage to get most of it on her nails and little on myself. I consider that a huge accomplishment. She seems so much happier when I take the time to listen to all her stories and make her giggle at my funny faces. So precious is a life that you helped create.

On another note, yesterday I spent the day labor ridden. I painted up the stairs and in the loft area. An area that I thought would only take me a few hours turned into most of my day. Out with the yellow paint!! Savannah showed me yesterday that a tension gate will not work at the top of the stairs. I thought it was pretty tight. Well at least as tight as I could get it. She eventually rolled over there and kicked it down as my back was turned. My heart jumped only to see the baby gate laying in two pieces at the bottom and a little Savannah smiling from ear to ear kicking her legs at the top of the steps. Baby gate attempt #1 failed so we will have to invest in something a little more powerful. :)